today my bestfriend's dad passed away. i cant even begin to comprehend how she must feel since i'm a bit of a wreck myself. it was so sudden and unexpected, we just kinda sat in her room for a while and tried to take in what just happened. i always thought he would walk her down the aisle, coodle her kids, be at my own wedding and live to be one of those wonderfully cranky old men. instead, he chose to go peacefully in his sleep while everyone was busy with their lives.
tito nick was such a character. i have a million and one stories about him which we all love rehashing whenever we get together. like that one christmas when he explicitly made it known that all he wanted was a pack of tighty-whities. and how he used to tease maya that she loved porn since she always watched sex and the city, how he insisted on wearing his favorite polo even when it was so old and holey already. tito nick had one of those distant laughs, the really contageous kind. and he always wore a toupe, a funny looking one till one day he decided to just screw the whole thing and go au naturel. he had a dog named butch whom he loved like a son. siopao and ice pop was always reserved for butch and none of us could touch it. he hated answering the phone and always told us maya was sleeping whenever we called past 9pm. he always made us feel welcome and often struck up the funniest of conversations. at one time, he thought maya and an ex boyfriend of mine were going out behind my back and he got really pissed at her. she had to explain that he just picks her up when we all go out because none of us could drive back then. he lived a really simple life. work, home, and a little bit of casino time. he was one of the those people who never owned a cellphone or beeper since he didn't believe in them. he was a cardiologist and quite ironically he died of heart failure.
he was like a dad to me since i practically grew up in my bestfriends house. i never really knew how much he meant to me till he was gone.
Monday, May 30, 2005
finally. summer camp is over! and i had a full weekend without having to worry about snacks for the kids on monday. haha. i got a pedicure, manicure, took out all unwanted hair, went to the beach, got a golden tan and basically lounged around stan's house with "my" new iBook G4. i feel like a woman again. and a hot one at that. hehe.
stan's stuff for the Apple store arrived and he handed me an iBook to use while we're together. nifty little thing. i'm in love with it. in exchange he has me reading up on everything about Macs and iPods so i can help him during the first few months of the store. yeah yeah.. i'm so wifely now. i've been deciding on flooring, cabinets, colors... it's scarey. and he likes running things by me which i think is wonderful. i secretly love it that he thinks my opinion is important and he takes the time to makes important decisions with my input.
today we got matching flu shots. his mom, who is one of the nicest-in-her-own-way women i know, sat us down and poked our arms with needles. stan's mom can be intimidating and she really is the head of that household but i think it's so sweet how she kinda includes me in her shopping list and gives me little "family" responsibilities like making sure stan calls the house if we're not eating dinner with them.
next week, i get to wear heels again and dress up. i've been in shorts and rubber shoes the whole month of May and i was kinda getting tired of my kikay-ness being supressed.
cheers to one month of being childless! (school starts july 13).
stan's stuff for the Apple store arrived and he handed me an iBook to use while we're together. nifty little thing. i'm in love with it. in exchange he has me reading up on everything about Macs and iPods so i can help him during the first few months of the store. yeah yeah.. i'm so wifely now. i've been deciding on flooring, cabinets, colors... it's scarey. and he likes running things by me which i think is wonderful. i secretly love it that he thinks my opinion is important and he takes the time to makes important decisions with my input.
today we got matching flu shots. his mom, who is one of the nicest-in-her-own-way women i know, sat us down and poked our arms with needles. stan's mom can be intimidating and she really is the head of that household but i think it's so sweet how she kinda includes me in her shopping list and gives me little "family" responsibilities like making sure stan calls the house if we're not eating dinner with them.
next week, i get to wear heels again and dress up. i've been in shorts and rubber shoes the whole month of May and i was kinda getting tired of my kikay-ness being supressed.
cheers to one month of being childless! (school starts july 13).
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
facial
he made me laugh for almost 10 minutes straight last night.
i wanted to give myself a facial but he wanted me to hang out in his house and watch tv. healthy compromise: bring my facial stuff there. i asked him if he wanted me to give him a facial and he willingly obliged even though i could see that he was tired and had some work to do at home. so we went through the whole routine together, soaping, scrubbing, slathering... and while we were letting those leave-in-for-10-minutes masks dry his dad (who is one of the most conservative and can be really stiff at times) called him because he wanted to discuss business.
i cringed for him and he was laughing so hard already as he walked over to the study and i heard his dad kinda chuckle when he got there. i was in heaps of laughter on the couch.
i wanted to give myself a facial but he wanted me to hang out in his house and watch tv. healthy compromise: bring my facial stuff there. i asked him if he wanted me to give him a facial and he willingly obliged even though i could see that he was tired and had some work to do at home. so we went through the whole routine together, soaping, scrubbing, slathering... and while we were letting those leave-in-for-10-minutes masks dry his dad (who is one of the most conservative and can be really stiff at times) called him because he wanted to discuss business.
i cringed for him and he was laughing so hard already as he walked over to the study and i heard his dad kinda chuckle when he got there. i was in heaps of laughter on the couch.
Saturday, May 21, 2005
saturdays
he goes to work on saturdays and for some reason, he likes taking me with him. i tinker with the pcs, talk to a friend who now works for him (i pirated him from my old ad agency), dream up renovation plans, snack, fall asleep on the bean bag provided for me in his office... now, i have an added responsibility of making the ads for his new apple store and deciding on what floor to put, how many shelves to make etc etc.
last saturday, he got pissed at me. well, rightfully so i guess. i just added more stress to his already bad day. a really good friend of mine got admitted to the hospital and i could not NOT visit him. i guess i just chose the most unoppurtune time to do it. he wanted to go to the office in the morning but didn't because i wanted to make a visit. i guess i got a bit carried away with conversation and was an hour late. poker faced and huffy, he let me kiss him on the cheek and drove to the office very calmly reprimanding me for my misconduct.
i felt like a little child who ate too many cookies or something.
well, soon my saturdays are going to be spent in school. i still get moments of uncertainty and i wonder what the hell i'm doing. i guess, i can't think of anything else i want to do and i don't want to let go of my "plan" coz then i'm going to go back to being unfocused and goal-less which i hate.
last saturday, he got pissed at me. well, rightfully so i guess. i just added more stress to his already bad day. a really good friend of mine got admitted to the hospital and i could not NOT visit him. i guess i just chose the most unoppurtune time to do it. he wanted to go to the office in the morning but didn't because i wanted to make a visit. i guess i got a bit carried away with conversation and was an hour late. poker faced and huffy, he let me kiss him on the cheek and drove to the office very calmly reprimanding me for my misconduct.
i felt like a little child who ate too many cookies or something.
well, soon my saturdays are going to be spent in school. i still get moments of uncertainty and i wonder what the hell i'm doing. i guess, i can't think of anything else i want to do and i don't want to let go of my "plan" coz then i'm going to go back to being unfocused and goal-less which i hate.
Friday, May 13, 2005
job hazard
i took my class on a field trip yesterday. we went to our farm up in the mountains and everything went beautifully until i just had to ask if they wanted to ride horses. so one by one, they rode the horses. then came dani's turn. she's a beautiful, sweet and charming little 5 year old whom i adore. but she's a little on the heavy side. i lift her up to get on the horse but she's really too heavy for me to get on to the saddle. her legs fall a little short and she accidentally kicks the horse. i'm unable to get out of the way in time and end up getting kicked by the horse about 2 cm above my knee cap. we both fall to ground and thank God nothing happened to her. i, on the other hand, am probably going to hobbling for a while and high on painkillers since it was a pretty bad bruise. i have a freekin hoof mark on my leg.
i should get job hazard pay.
i should get job hazard pay.
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
postponing
i've decided that it's too much of a hassle to go to manila for the weekend with my parents so i'm staying home. sorry ka. =( we haven't even left yet and they're at each others throats. plus, they've decided to stay separately even if the trip is only two days. having to pick where i'm going to stay is not something i want to do this weekend. but there's a VUDU AT EMBASSY thing happening at the end of may so maybe i'll just save my manila trip for that instead. apparently, all the usual suspects of VUDU are going. so we'll see..
on other news, i got contacts!! finally! after months of waiting through messed up orders. the world looks so clear and real. i never really knew what i looked like till now, from afar anyway. hehe. gawd. i feel like a kid who just learned to read.
aside from that, life's pretty normal and the same.
on other news, i got contacts!! finally! after months of waiting through messed up orders. the world looks so clear and real. i never really knew what i looked like till now, from afar anyway. hehe. gawd. i feel like a kid who just learned to read.
aside from that, life's pretty normal and the same.
Monday, May 09, 2005
BORAX
what on earth is BORAX? i've searched everywhere... grocery, pharmacy, hardware etc etc.. and no one can tell me what it is! i need it to make slime for my science class. if anyone can help me. please do.
Thursday, May 05, 2005
ex issues
his ex issues:
him: i have a crazy feeling she's going to call or text me sometime soon.
me: it better not be this week because i'm totally PMSing.
...the back story...
his ex is going out with a guy whom we suspect has gotten a mutual friend of ours pregnant approximately 6 months ago. well, it's water under the bridge for the couple i guess since his ex and the guy got together just a couple months ago.we assume she already knows what she's gotten into. but now that our friend is out of hiding and walking around town with a prominent belly, everyone's buzzing with chismis.
my ex issues:
the ex: crazy question, would you like to watch emm gryner? with me?
me: uh, just because we've been sort of getting along lately doesn't mean i'm going out with you. you keep forgetting i'm in a relationship that i care very deeply about. us going out is a total impossibility. i'm sorry. i really hope you're over me now.
...the back story...
i CANNOT hold a grudge. forgiveness is second nature, so sue me. and i mean this as a general trait.. not just to a select few. i definetely have a bitch bone but it's pretty short fused. we kinda made up a few weeks ago. let's just say i got caught off guard in a really good mood. shit happens. this is good anyway. i've got no hang ups, no rancor towards anyone. long live world peace. but he says he'll never get over me. knowing him, maybe this is more about winning than it is about love. love could have saved us but it didn't show up when it could have. now it's too late and i'll forever be the one who rubs salt in his wounds. his choice, not mine.
crisis management:
his ex issues
much as i would hate for him to coo her into sanity, i'd let the waterfall fall. rule number one. men will do whatever they want no matter what. rule number two. women rock! rule number three. a violation of trust is not acceptable. forgiveness will eventually happen but there will be dire consequences. rule number four. trust him with your life, heart, soul.. until he fucks it up. innocent until proven guilty rationale.
what i said to him that people don't normally say:
well, if you chose someone else in the end then i'll be hurt of course. but at least i was loved by you at one point so i guess it'll work out for both of us.
yeah yeah.. i got all emotional and went belly up exposing everything i had to offer. better to have said what you wanted to say than regret not ever having said it at all.
i think there's a certain freedom you gain in showing the whole deck of cards once in a while as opposed to keeping them so closely held all the time. good for you who can actually muster the courage and say it before the moment passes you by. no matter what you do, love will always end in tears. a break up... death. so why be afraid of throwing all care to the wind and basking in the wonderfulness of voicing love out. i think i would hate for the one i love to remember nothing but small talk in our relationship.
so what's in store for me:
same old, same old. life goes on as usual and i deal with it one at a time. maybe i'm stressing over nothing. maybe i'm setting myself up for heartache. the key is balance. i learned that the hard way. one thing i know is, i'm stronger than i thought i was. what i thought would break me down forever, built me up even more. i guess what they say is true.. whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
him: i have a crazy feeling she's going to call or text me sometime soon.
me: it better not be this week because i'm totally PMSing.
...the back story...
his ex is going out with a guy whom we suspect has gotten a mutual friend of ours pregnant approximately 6 months ago. well, it's water under the bridge for the couple i guess since his ex and the guy got together just a couple months ago.we assume she already knows what she's gotten into. but now that our friend is out of hiding and walking around town with a prominent belly, everyone's buzzing with chismis.
my ex issues:
the ex: crazy question, would you like to watch emm gryner? with me?
me: uh, just because we've been sort of getting along lately doesn't mean i'm going out with you. you keep forgetting i'm in a relationship that i care very deeply about. us going out is a total impossibility. i'm sorry. i really hope you're over me now.
...the back story...
i CANNOT hold a grudge. forgiveness is second nature, so sue me. and i mean this as a general trait.. not just to a select few. i definetely have a bitch bone but it's pretty short fused. we kinda made up a few weeks ago. let's just say i got caught off guard in a really good mood. shit happens. this is good anyway. i've got no hang ups, no rancor towards anyone. long live world peace. but he says he'll never get over me. knowing him, maybe this is more about winning than it is about love. love could have saved us but it didn't show up when it could have. now it's too late and i'll forever be the one who rubs salt in his wounds. his choice, not mine.
crisis management:
his ex issues
much as i would hate for him to coo her into sanity, i'd let the waterfall fall. rule number one. men will do whatever they want no matter what. rule number two. women rock! rule number three. a violation of trust is not acceptable. forgiveness will eventually happen but there will be dire consequences. rule number four. trust him with your life, heart, soul.. until he fucks it up. innocent until proven guilty rationale.
what i said to him that people don't normally say:
well, if you chose someone else in the end then i'll be hurt of course. but at least i was loved by you at one point so i guess it'll work out for both of us.
yeah yeah.. i got all emotional and went belly up exposing everything i had to offer. better to have said what you wanted to say than regret not ever having said it at all.
i think there's a certain freedom you gain in showing the whole deck of cards once in a while as opposed to keeping them so closely held all the time. good for you who can actually muster the courage and say it before the moment passes you by. no matter what you do, love will always end in tears. a break up... death. so why be afraid of throwing all care to the wind and basking in the wonderfulness of voicing love out. i think i would hate for the one i love to remember nothing but small talk in our relationship.
so what's in store for me:
same old, same old. life goes on as usual and i deal with it one at a time. maybe i'm stressing over nothing. maybe i'm setting myself up for heartache. the key is balance. i learned that the hard way. one thing i know is, i'm stronger than i thought i was. what i thought would break me down forever, built me up even more. i guess what they say is true.. whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
my song to you luv.
Airplanes
Take you away again
Are you flying
Above where we live
Then I look up a glare in my eyes
Are you having regrets about last night
I'm not but I like rivers that rush in
So then I dove in
Is there trouble ahead
For you the acrobat
I won't push you unless you have a net
You say the word
You know I will find you
Or if you need some time
I don't mind
I don't hold on
To the tail of your kite
I'm not like the girls that you've known
But I believe I'm worth coming home to
Kiss away night
This girl only sleeps with butterflies
With butterflies
So go on and fly then boy
Balloons
Look good from on the ground
I fear with pins and needles around
We may fall then stumble
Upon a carousel
It could take us anywhere
I'm not like the girls that you've known
But I believe I'm worth coming home to
Kiss away night
This girl only sleeps with butterflies
With butterflies
With butterflies
So go on and fly boy
Take you away again
Are you flying
Above where we live
Then I look up a glare in my eyes
Are you having regrets about last night
I'm not but I like rivers that rush in
So then I dove in
Is there trouble ahead
For you the acrobat
I won't push you unless you have a net
You say the word
You know I will find you
Or if you need some time
I don't mind
I don't hold on
To the tail of your kite
I'm not like the girls that you've known
But I believe I'm worth coming home to
Kiss away night
This girl only sleeps with butterflies
With butterflies
So go on and fly then boy
Balloons
Look good from on the ground
I fear with pins and needles around
We may fall then stumble
Upon a carousel
It could take us anywhere
I'm not like the girls that you've known
But I believe I'm worth coming home to
Kiss away night
This girl only sleeps with butterflies
With butterflies
With butterflies
So go on and fly boy
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