Monday, July 21, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Thursday, May 29, 2008
life in the fast lane.
i've officially been thrust into my rubik's cube career. why settle for one when you can do it all? marketing for iStore, voluntary personal assistant of stan (his favorite task for me to do: answer the question "What day is it today?"), ESL tutor and part time Art and Creative Writing teacher.
so far, things are going well with my trusty Starbucks planner always at my side. my days are filling up with things to do and people to see. most people might think i'm nuts to give up the slow paced, smelling the roses kind of life i had for 3 years as a full time teacher but i think my inner sacred hearter had to be sated. though i look built for comfort, i have an insane need for speed. time management has to be perfected to a tee.
and of course, being a woman.. i have to accomplish all this looking well put together, keeping a household of 4 dogs and 1 boyfriend happy, sparing time to cook for potluck dinner with friends and fixing stan's favorite white cap that turned yellow... not to mention 2 younger sisters who call in for favors once in a while.
the one thing i vow never to be too busy for: coffee date with friends.
yup. i think i have about enough practice to last me through the real thing.
so far, things are going well with my trusty Starbucks planner always at my side. my days are filling up with things to do and people to see. most people might think i'm nuts to give up the slow paced, smelling the roses kind of life i had for 3 years as a full time teacher but i think my inner sacred hearter had to be sated. though i look built for comfort, i have an insane need for speed. time management has to be perfected to a tee.
and of course, being a woman.. i have to accomplish all this looking well put together, keeping a household of 4 dogs and 1 boyfriend happy, sparing time to cook for potluck dinner with friends and fixing stan's favorite white cap that turned yellow... not to mention 2 younger sisters who call in for favors once in a while.
the one thing i vow never to be too busy for: coffee date with friends.
yup. i think i have about enough practice to last me through the real thing.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
one of those cosmo magazine moments
you know that part in magazines where people send in their most embarrassing moments and you think to yourself "i wonder if this really happened or is she just making it up." well, mine did.
it all started with my one day period. i thought nothing of it till somewhere in the middle of talking about haagen dasz ice cream with ren, i decided to nonchalantly bring it up. her response started setting it all downhill. "one day period? oh yes... that's how i found out i was pregnant!" DING DING DING DING! you can just imagine the alarm bells ringing in my head and the cold sweat starting to break out on my forehead. ren assured me though that it could be nothing too so i was appeased by that thought for about a week. then after a couple of days my boobs began to throb. at first it was just a dull pain when i squeezed them to check and then it started to escalate into a even-when-you-don't-touch-them-they-hurt kind of pain. against my better judgement and rationality, i started to panic.
instinctively, i call up maya for moral support to go and face the music instead of spending more sleepless nights thinking about it. so we go to the pharmacy and buy a pregnancy test. so we're there, discussing worst case scenario solutions when i hear the pharmacist shouting loudly from the other side of the store "kang kinsa ning pregnancy test?" mortified and immobilized, i watch in horror as the pharmacist right in front of me shouts equally as loudly and points to me "diri!" luckily, maya who was more more lucid than i snatched the plastic bag out of the pharmacist's hands with a defiant i-don't-care look.
so there. thanks to bestfriends who are willing to go with you in the middle of the night in their slippers, save you from gawking there like an idiot, getting a cup for you to pee in and telling you you're not pregnant (i was too nervous to look at the strip myself) coz there's only one line on the pregnancy strip test. i love you may! :) i'd do the same for you any day.
it all started with my one day period. i thought nothing of it till somewhere in the middle of talking about haagen dasz ice cream with ren, i decided to nonchalantly bring it up. her response started setting it all downhill. "one day period? oh yes... that's how i found out i was pregnant!" DING DING DING DING! you can just imagine the alarm bells ringing in my head and the cold sweat starting to break out on my forehead. ren assured me though that it could be nothing too so i was appeased by that thought for about a week. then after a couple of days my boobs began to throb. at first it was just a dull pain when i squeezed them to check and then it started to escalate into a even-when-you-don't-touch-them-they-hurt kind of pain. against my better judgement and rationality, i started to panic.
instinctively, i call up maya for moral support to go and face the music instead of spending more sleepless nights thinking about it. so we go to the pharmacy and buy a pregnancy test. so we're there, discussing worst case scenario solutions when i hear the pharmacist shouting loudly from the other side of the store "kang kinsa ning pregnancy test?" mortified and immobilized, i watch in horror as the pharmacist right in front of me shouts equally as loudly and points to me "diri!" luckily, maya who was more more lucid than i snatched the plastic bag out of the pharmacist's hands with a defiant i-don't-care look.
so there. thanks to bestfriends who are willing to go with you in the middle of the night in their slippers, save you from gawking there like an idiot, getting a cup for you to pee in and telling you you're not pregnant (i was too nervous to look at the strip myself) coz there's only one line on the pregnancy strip test. i love you may! :) i'd do the same for you any day.
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
I'm happy!
I'm happy! I'm happy! I'm happy! I'm happy!
Finally. I think Stan and I have finally reached the end of that weird plateau in our relationship and gotten back some excitement in our lives. Maybe this working together thing is actually good for us. We have more stuff to talk about at the end of the day and I love it when he actually puts down his guard and asks for help and opinions on this and that. I think he was just getting spread too thin and needed someone to be his sounding board and support beam with the all work problems he has. We've been laughing more lately and that's such a welcome change from the indirect frustration we've been steaming off at each other before.
That spark you get when you first start going out is back. I'm proud of us for having stuck through the hard times and I'm so super glad the happier times are back.
Finally. I think Stan and I have finally reached the end of that weird plateau in our relationship and gotten back some excitement in our lives. Maybe this working together thing is actually good for us. We have more stuff to talk about at the end of the day and I love it when he actually puts down his guard and asks for help and opinions on this and that. I think he was just getting spread too thin and needed someone to be his sounding board and support beam with the all work problems he has. We've been laughing more lately and that's such a welcome change from the indirect frustration we've been steaming off at each other before.
That spark you get when you first start going out is back. I'm proud of us for having stuck through the hard times and I'm so super glad the happier times are back.
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Articles I came across while passing time at work
Today was a slow day at work. The kids were busy with their year end projects hence I was left with a bit of spare time to do some surfing. I came across these two articles that I found in the New York Times that were quite amusing. Enjoy! :)
Enjoy!
The Art of Teaching
a Philosophy of Possibility
My love of teaching springs from a self-indulgent love for art. All throughout my childhood, I was always the seemingly nerdy kid seen sitting in the hallways pouring my thoughts into my drawing book. As a child, I shied away from many things like speaking up in class, and participating in sports. I froze whenever my teacher called me and it was a nightmare giving reports in front of class or anything or the sort. I wasn’t the most exuberant girl and being popular was out of my league. Needless to say, I didn’t fit the mold and was pretty much the odd one out for most of my elementary years.
The only time I knew I was in my element was with a crayon in hand. The ability to draw and express myself through colors and shapes was such a wonderful stepping stone to confidence. I gained a sense of self worth and identity. Through art, I had a place in the world. A courage to step up to life’s challenges.
I hope by teaching art, I can somehow bring out that confidence in children. My goal is not to teach the brightest and the best but to reach out to the one who tries. To make a glimmer of imagination made tangible. Nothing can compare to the feeling of accomplishment when you’ve created something with your hands and heart. I hope I can somehow pass that on to my students and instill in them the idea that they can do anything they put their minds to. The possibilities are endless.
“ I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.”
-Albert Einstein (1879-1955) Physicist.
***
To end the school year, we all had to make a paper on our personal teaching philosophy. Just thought I'd write it here too for posterity's sake.
My love of teaching springs from a self-indulgent love for art. All throughout my childhood, I was always the seemingly nerdy kid seen sitting in the hallways pouring my thoughts into my drawing book. As a child, I shied away from many things like speaking up in class, and participating in sports. I froze whenever my teacher called me and it was a nightmare giving reports in front of class or anything or the sort. I wasn’t the most exuberant girl and being popular was out of my league. Needless to say, I didn’t fit the mold and was pretty much the odd one out for most of my elementary years.
The only time I knew I was in my element was with a crayon in hand. The ability to draw and express myself through colors and shapes was such a wonderful stepping stone to confidence. I gained a sense of self worth and identity. Through art, I had a place in the world. A courage to step up to life’s challenges.
I hope by teaching art, I can somehow bring out that confidence in children. My goal is not to teach the brightest and the best but to reach out to the one who tries. To make a glimmer of imagination made tangible. Nothing can compare to the feeling of accomplishment when you’ve created something with your hands and heart. I hope I can somehow pass that on to my students and instill in them the idea that they can do anything they put their minds to. The possibilities are endless.
“ I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.”
-Albert Einstein (1879-1955) Physicist.
***
To end the school year, we all had to make a paper on our personal teaching philosophy. Just thought I'd write it here too for posterity's sake.
Sunday, March 09, 2008
Thursday, March 06, 2008
better late than never
after months of bemoaning the rut my relationship has seemingly fallen into, there finally seems to be some movement in the tectonic plates. stan has asked me to work for iStore and i have graciously accepted. i hope that's chinese for "i love you and will marry you soon." we still have to work out the details but i'm psyched to know that he's somehow made a move to make me a fixture in his life. knowing that we're moving forward, even if it's at the slowest snail's pace is better than nothing at all.
so there. new year, new job, new life.
i still want to keep the door open to my old life as a safety net so i've agreed to work part time as a teacher still. i'll work most mornings of the week as an art teacher and in the afternoons, i'll be switching hats as a marketing manager. this might be quite a challenge as the dress code calls for completely different outfits but i think it's time to end my 4 year vacation and be more productive. i miss being stressed out. i miss beating deadlines. and although hugs and kisses from the kids are nice, i miss looking pretty for work. i'm glad i now have the chance to be able do both things i'm passionate about - art, helping kids and being there for stan. believe, me... even if he was a farmer and i had to help plant rice (which isn't fun)
this is probably one of the biggest leaps of faith i've taken in the relationship. i'm keeping my fingers crossed he sees the serendipity in it all and closes the deal.
so there. new year, new job, new life.
i still want to keep the door open to my old life as a safety net so i've agreed to work part time as a teacher still. i'll work most mornings of the week as an art teacher and in the afternoons, i'll be switching hats as a marketing manager. this might be quite a challenge as the dress code calls for completely different outfits but i think it's time to end my 4 year vacation and be more productive. i miss being stressed out. i miss beating deadlines. and although hugs and kisses from the kids are nice, i miss looking pretty for work. i'm glad i now have the chance to be able do both things i'm passionate about - art, helping kids and being there for stan. believe, me... even if he was a farmer and i had to help plant rice (which isn't fun)
this is probably one of the biggest leaps of faith i've taken in the relationship. i'm keeping my fingers crossed he sees the serendipity in it all and closes the deal.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
baby, don't you break my heart slow
I like the way you wanted me
Every night for so long baby
I like the way you needed me
Every time things got rocky
I was believing in you
Am I mistaken do you say,
Do you say what you mean
I want our love to last forever
But Id rather you be mean than love and lie
Id rather hear the truth and have to say goodbye
Id rather take a blow at least then I would know
But baby dont you break my heart slow
I like the way youd hold me
Every night for so long baby
And I like the way youd say my name
In the middle of the night
While you were sleeping
I was believing in you
Was I mistaken
Do you mean, mean what you say
When you say our love could last forever
Well Id rather you be mean than love and lie
Id rather hear the truth and have to say goodbye
Id rather take a blow at least then I would know
But baby dont you break my heart slow
You would run around and lead me on forever
While I wait at home thinking that were together
I wanted our love to last forever
Well Id rather you be mean than love and lie
Id rather hear the truth and have to say goodbye
Id rather take a blow at least then I would know
But baby dont you break my heart slow
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
i woke up to the weirdness that is my mother today.
as i was getting ready for work, she came into my room and told me she was concerned over the fact that stan left me for valentines day. the conversation transformed into a paranoia session of her insisting that he was cheating on me or going behind my back solely on the basis of the date of his departure and her weird looming feeling of dread and doom. when i started to defend him, she went on about how i was in denial. i realized that there was no winning this argument or convincing her otherwise so i left.
so why am i even bothering to blog about it? i just felt the need to write down and declare the things i couldn't earlier.
i admit that our relationship isn't perfect and i did feel bad that he had to leave. but to jump to baseless conclusions is a complete waste of time. i know stan well enough to know that he has enough moral fiber NOT to cheat on me or any other person he's with for that matter. he may not be the most romantic or showy person when it comes to affection but i know in his heart of hearts that he loves me and knows that love doesn't always mean that fluttering feeling in your stomach. it comes in practical things too like making time for me at the end of the day every day despite his hectic work schedule, asking my advice about what to do for the store or what i think would be the best thing for him to do in a situation, having to leave for manila for work but NEVER staying for the weekend or even seeing his friends there because it's solely a work trip. and it also comes in sweet nothings like randomly squeezing my nose, making me laugh, snuggling up to me when i know he's had a bad day.
and believe me, if i could have him every day except on valentine's day for the rest of my life, he'd still be worth it. :)
as i was getting ready for work, she came into my room and told me she was concerned over the fact that stan left me for valentines day. the conversation transformed into a paranoia session of her insisting that he was cheating on me or going behind my back solely on the basis of the date of his departure and her weird looming feeling of dread and doom. when i started to defend him, she went on about how i was in denial. i realized that there was no winning this argument or convincing her otherwise so i left.
so why am i even bothering to blog about it? i just felt the need to write down and declare the things i couldn't earlier.
i admit that our relationship isn't perfect and i did feel bad that he had to leave. but to jump to baseless conclusions is a complete waste of time. i know stan well enough to know that he has enough moral fiber NOT to cheat on me or any other person he's with for that matter. he may not be the most romantic or showy person when it comes to affection but i know in his heart of hearts that he loves me and knows that love doesn't always mean that fluttering feeling in your stomach. it comes in practical things too like making time for me at the end of the day every day despite his hectic work schedule, asking my advice about what to do for the store or what i think would be the best thing for him to do in a situation, having to leave for manila for work but NEVER staying for the weekend or even seeing his friends there because it's solely a work trip. and it also comes in sweet nothings like randomly squeezing my nose, making me laugh, snuggling up to me when i know he's had a bad day.
and believe me, if i could have him every day except on valentine's day for the rest of my life, he'd still be worth it. :)
Thursday, January 10, 2008
today was not the day
i've been rehearsing my "ultimatum" speech for God knows how long and i was actually going to do it today. i had it all planned out, my moment, my introduction, my ending. plus i guess the fact that he's leaving kinda makes it more "dramatic".
i planned to do it after dinner when we we settle into out ass-grooved green leather couch and he'd ask me to rub his back like we've done everyday for the past 3 and a half years. i'd nonchalantly glide over the topic and just let my speech roll out. his thinkpiece for when he's away from me.
my plan was thwarted by 2 things. running into a close highschool classmate of mine and her announcing her engagement to stan and i. i didn't want him to think that just because my friend was getting married, i was wanted to too. a while later, i was peering over his shoulder while he was chatting and caught a line of one of this conversations with a friend of his saying "dude. you really should get married soon!" i guess that's tough taking that kind of pressure from your friends if you're 36 year old bachelor.
i just took it as a sign that it wasn't the right time yet. or maybe it was some sort of divine intervention telling me to just stick to my guns and wait it out with patience and love. God knows you need lots of that when you're married, so why not practice holding your tongue while you aren't. besides, it wouldn't be fair to him if i sent him off on his business trip/vacation with something as heavy as eternal bondage weighing on his mind.
so there. love and self sacrifice wins it at the end of the day. he's worth it though.
i planned to do it after dinner when we we settle into out ass-grooved green leather couch and he'd ask me to rub his back like we've done everyday for the past 3 and a half years. i'd nonchalantly glide over the topic and just let my speech roll out. his thinkpiece for when he's away from me.
my plan was thwarted by 2 things. running into a close highschool classmate of mine and her announcing her engagement to stan and i. i didn't want him to think that just because my friend was getting married, i was wanted to too. a while later, i was peering over his shoulder while he was chatting and caught a line of one of this conversations with a friend of his saying "dude. you really should get married soon!" i guess that's tough taking that kind of pressure from your friends if you're 36 year old bachelor.
i just took it as a sign that it wasn't the right time yet. or maybe it was some sort of divine intervention telling me to just stick to my guns and wait it out with patience and love. God knows you need lots of that when you're married, so why not practice holding your tongue while you aren't. besides, it wouldn't be fair to him if i sent him off on his business trip/vacation with something as heavy as eternal bondage weighing on his mind.
so there. love and self sacrifice wins it at the end of the day. he's worth it though.
Monday, January 07, 2008
our annual time apart
it's that time of year again when stan makes his annual pilgrimage to the birthplace of the Mac. well, as much as i don't want him to go, i know this yearly time apart does us good one way or another but it still sucks because i miss him when he's away.
so, time to whip up my list of things to do when i'm "single"...
paint
bake
see my friends (and you guys better see me!!)
spend time with my sisters
spend time with my dogs
hopefully get around to my grand plan of fixing my room
so, time to whip up my list of things to do when i'm "single"...
paint
bake
see my friends (and you guys better see me!!)
spend time with my sisters
spend time with my dogs
hopefully get around to my grand plan of fixing my room
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