i've been rehearsing my "ultimatum" speech for God knows how long and i was actually going to do it today. i had it all planned out, my moment, my introduction, my ending. plus i guess the fact that he's leaving kinda makes it more "dramatic".
i planned to do it after dinner when we we settle into out ass-grooved green leather couch and he'd ask me to rub his back like we've done everyday for the past 3 and a half years. i'd nonchalantly glide over the topic and just let my speech roll out. his thinkpiece for when he's away from me.
my plan was thwarted by 2 things. running into a close highschool classmate of mine and her announcing her engagement to stan and i. i didn't want him to think that just because my friend was getting married, i was wanted to too. a while later, i was peering over his shoulder while he was chatting and caught a line of one of this conversations with a friend of his saying "dude. you really should get married soon!" i guess that's tough taking that kind of pressure from your friends if you're 36 year old bachelor.
i just took it as a sign that it wasn't the right time yet. or maybe it was some sort of divine intervention telling me to just stick to my guns and wait it out with patience and love. God knows you need lots of that when you're married, so why not practice holding your tongue while you aren't. besides, it wouldn't be fair to him if i sent him off on his business trip/vacation with something as heavy as eternal bondage weighing on his mind.
so there. love and self sacrifice wins it at the end of the day. he's worth it though.
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